Wednesday, April 21, 2004

Putting Shit in Perspective

Being unemployed, writing in this diary is totally not lucrative at all. Why do for free what you could not do for free? There are a lot of things that I can do for absolutely no pay at all, and writing in my gay diary is not at the top of the list.

Anyhow, let me tell you this fact: not working is totally fucking awesome. It is not, however, very interesting. Today, for example, my alarm went off at nine. Did I get up at nine, ready to take the bit in the teeth and kick the shit out of this day? Absofuckingnotly. I went right back to sleep, a-holes. Then I ate three donuts and two eggs. By the time I return to the ranks of the gainfully employed I hope to have gainfully employed three hundred pounds.

Ask me how many times I have played playstation 2 since I have stopped working? Only once, motherfuckers, once because THE VIDEO GAMES NEVER STOP!

I don't listen to NPR or read the NewsPapeR anymore because current events are for fags! I did glance at the headlines in the New York Times long enough to give you the Corporate Casual Headline of the Week. It was the tagline for a review of the new Denzel Washington--greatest blactor ever, according to the Academy--and it said "There Is a Price to Pay For Kidnapping Little Girls." Judging by the previews, the price involves Mexico City and fire.

In the time it has taken you to read this post, someone has died.


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