Tuesday, November 02, 2004

I Gave Blood

At my polling place this morning they ran out of "I Voted" stickers so they started giving out "I Gave Blood" stickers. I guess just because grown-ups love to wear stickers that show they did something? It's like the gold star of the adult world. First, though, when I was waiting for the guy to find my little name tag and put it on his check sheet along with my ballot number, I saw the tag right away in the middle of the page he was opened to, but it took him three minutes of flipping back to the beginning of the book and starting over and I wanted to just point out my name to him but then I thought that maybe he would think I was a VOTER FRAUD and so I just waited patiently. This is, of course, ridiculous for two reasons:

1. I had both my driver's license and my voter registration card in my wallet.
2. I am not black.

Anyhow, voting always makes me nervous because as soon as I am done I think that I have fucked up and voted for all the wrong things. In 2002, during the GREAT REPUBLICAN DOMINATION STATION I actually was one of those tools who over-voted, and that got me really bugged, but I was living in Illinois at the time and that's a state planted quite firmly in the DEMOCRATIC MACHINE POLITIK. Even the Republicans they do nominate are just CRAZY SEX ADDICTS.

Am I right that in Ohio any voter who suspects the qualifications of another voter may question him/her? If this is true, it is awesome. I AM MAKING A CITIZEN'S ARREST, ONLY FOR VOTING! PRESENT YOUR DOCUMENTATION, COMRADE BLACKMAN!

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