Friday, September 09, 2005

Worker #3116 Makes Clown Coffee Look Like a Blowhard

Clown Coffee: Look at what the New York Times said: "President Bush's response to Hurricane Katrina has been, to put it kindly, faltering. He has fallen short both rhetorically and substantively. The rhetorical failure is less important but perhaps more surprising for a politician with his strong communications skills."
Worker #3116: Strong communication skills?
Clown Coffee: I know.
Worker #3116: That doesn't make any sense. Even his supporters don't think he has strong communication skills.
Clown Coffee: I know. He makes Jimmy Carter look like John F. Kennedy.
Worker #3116: Yeah.
Clown Coffee: He makes Spartan brand peanut butter look like Jiffy brand peanut butter.
Worker #3116: He makes the girl who played Wiener Dog look like Catherine Deneuve.
Clown Coffee: He makes coal look like diamonds.
Worker #3116: He makes Mexicans look like white people.
Clown Coffee: He makes the National Enquirer look like Le Monde. He makes popcorn look like onion rings. He makes Marshall's look like Nieman Marcus. He makes Satan's Little Helper look like Citizen Kane. He makes rap look like classical. He makes cat vomit look like a delicious meal cooked by world's finest chefs. He makes a dead baby look like supermodels. He makes tea look like coffee. He makes dumb jokes look like funny jokes.
Worker #3116: Okay, you killed it. It's not funny anymore.
Clown Coffee: He makes--
Worker #3116: I SAID YOU KILLED IT.
Clown Coffee: Milwaukee? New York?
Worker #3116: No.


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